Discovering that you’re going to be a father is an outright strange period in your life. On one hand, you’re probably delighted: you’re going to pass on the family genes and have a child of your own to raise. On the other hand, you’re absolutely terrified when you contemplate just how much your life is about to change.
Don’t worry: both of these reactions are absolutely normal. It’s possible to be both excited and overwhelmed; delighted and dubious. You’ve got nine months to get yourself, and your life, into shape before you take the role of father– so you’re going to need an action plan.
How much does life change when you become a father?
In some ways, your life will change absolutely. Many new fathers experience a strange change in how they see the world; they are suddenly focused more on their child than on their own ambitions. Others don’t experience this; instead, they absorb their new role into their current life and, superficially at least, their lifestyle goes through few changes. Neither of these options is the “right” one; fatherhood is a very individual thing, and you have to work out your way of getting it right.
The changes you will definitely experience
It helps to know the changes you will definitely experience when you become a father. These can be set in stone, so you have some idea what to expect. Here’s a quick look at the biggest changes:
- Your relationship with your partner. It doesn’t matter if you’ve only been together for a few months or a few decades, your relationship will change– but not necessarily for the worse.
- Some aspects of your lifestyle. The announcement of a pregnancy is going to be a big change; you may need to move house so you can make room for a nursery, and you’ll probably need to swap your two-seater sports car for the likes of a Subaru Forester so you can fit a car seat. These changes are substantial and stressful, so you may need to take time to adjust to the rapid pace at which your life changes.
- Your time. You can expect to have less free time when you’re a father, so the duration of the pregnancy is a good opportunity to catch up with friends you might struggle to meet with over the next few years.
The emotional changes
Becoming a father isn’t just about the practicalities. Many men struggle with the emotional toll of fatherhood, and it’s important you allow yourself to feel these emotions. Fatherhood is a huge change, and you’re going to need to mentally ready yourself for it.
- It can be beneficial to have a couple of sessions with a therapist during the pregnancy, just to ensure that your mind is on an even keel before your baby’s arrival.
- You’ll also want to spend some time securing your support network of family and friends, because you’re likely to need them during the first few month’s of your baby’s life.
It’s okay to feel scared or nervous about the idea of becoming a father. Take the time to go through the steps above, consider the whole picture, and make the changes you have to make. Ultimately, you’ll discover that fatherhood does change your life– but it’s for the better. Until next time, it’s The Gentlemen’s Curb a lifestyle blog where fashion meets fitness in a BIG way. Feel free to email us if you have any topics of ideas that you would like us to cover! firstname.lastname@example.org