The Gentlemen’s Curb
We are back! It’s The Gentlemen’s Curb a lifestyle blog where fashion meets fitness in a BIG way. I hope that last week was great for you. For me, I had to have a one on one conversation with myself. For those that know, I have a BUNCH of issues that I am trying to work though. No one on the planet earth is perfect and social media at times can lead an impressionable mind to think that life is always perfect. There are ups and downs and one of the hardest challenges in life is to push through.
It bothers me that ideas of masculinity often deal with the idea of being non-expressive. It’s almost taboo for a man to express how he feels. It’s taboo, especially in relationships. Friendships or romantic relationships. We all hear the complaints of a man being “emotional.” Or in certain cases when we did express how we felt, we were ridiculed and made fun of. Or the line that most of the men reading this have heard too many times “it’s not that serious.” “Are you really mad over that?”
At what point can we express ourselves in a way where we won’t be ridiculed? I have been so conditioned to keep my emotions bottled in that I missed out on plenty opportunities. One may argue that those opportunities weren’t meant to be, but nonetheless, that fact remains that I didn’t express what I wanted and how I felt. It ended up being a huge issue for me in the long run.
Let’s be more specific, in matters of our health, when we feel pain and we should go for a check-up, we procrastinate because we have to “take it like a man.” Why the hell are many of us risking our lives because of a damn stereotype? I have come to the point that my health especially mental health is more valuable than how I am being perceived.
In matters of the heart, let’s just say I dropped the ball too many times because I didn’t want to be made fun of and laughed at. I wasn’t secure in being scared to be vulnerable at the hands of a woman that I had feelings for or maybe even loved.
When it came to my favorite artist, I could EASILY and VALIANTLY express how I felt, but I couldn’t express myself when it came to women or expressing my feelings in general.
I had a conversation on Sunday with someone and I wanted something from them so badly. I am sure that we wanted the same thing. They asked me what I wanted, but I was hesitant to say what I wanted. I didn’t want to be viewed as weak, soft, or a sucker. It dawned on me that I was being the BIGGEST sucker because I didn’t express myself, but also that I didn’t go after what I wanted.
I know that this post sounds like a bit of a rant, but I am putting myself on the chopping block so that other men that I KNOW go through this. This type of behavior has to cease so that I can move forward in my life.
1. You are valid and entitled to your feelings.
2. Always have to courage to say what you want. The world may not always be receptive, but you definitely owe to yourself.
3. Every king walks their own path. You can define your own destiny. Carve your legacy into the stone of life. (It sounds corny, but establish your legacy. Does that sound better?)
I hope you got something out of me sharing my experiences with you. Let me know what you think by leaving a comment or email us firstname.lastname@example.org. If you have a topic that you want us to cover, feel free to email us too. Until next time it’s the Gentlemen’s Curb a lifestyle blog where fashion meets fitness in a BIG way.